The 3 Step Guide To Baby Making

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Everyone knows that the best way for a man to get a woman pregnant is by setting up some sweet smelling candy-coated candles, placing a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon on the bathtub shelf (shampoo can take a hike!) and whistling off a few charming anecdotes to help foster the sensual mood.


Women would never go for this. I should know. I have been a woman for twenty-nine years, and only half these tricks work some of the time. Although if we’re being honest, a few jokes wouldn’t inhibit your potential lovemaking skills, men.

To all my Ladies out there! Attention!

There will probably come a time in your life when you get to the stage where you want to get pregnant. For some people, that never happens. For people like me, that stage got here like 10 years ago and is still waiting to be fulfilled. Regardless of where you’re at in this stage, though, whether you’ve been trying to create a love child for years or you’re just now ready to start, there’s one major thing you need to understand:

This getting pregnant business is hard. It takes a lot more than simply letting your man woo you and hoping it works out. It’s a largely scientific process, and it requires patience…a lot of it.

I know patience, especially when equated with sexuality and starting your own family, is tough and totally overrated.

You’re probably thinking, “I don’t want to learn about patience. What I really want to become is—pregnant!” I get that, and I’ve got your back. I’m going to lay out the three-step baby-making plan for you now. You can thank me later.

Step 1: You must stop using that horrific, sometimes magical stuff labeled Birth Control!

Let’s say you’ve been taking those cute, little vehement Birth Control pills since your high school days. Well, in case you were wondering, it may take your body some time to start ovulating in regular cycles once you stop taking your medication before it will begin to become primed for pregnancy. Sounds sexy, right? For many women it can take less than a month to get everything back on track, but it’s not uncommon to need to stop taking your birth control up to a full year before you start trying to conceive.

Still with me? Onward women!

Step 2: Figure out those Fertile Days!

You must figure out when that Egg of yours is egging you on. (I know, my jokes are fabulous.) Seriously, you need to know the days when your eggs are ready to sprout and grow into fertile little minions. This timing is crucial to becoming pregnant.  Dr. Osawe, board certified OBGYN at Health Quest Medical Practice, advises patients to “Know your cycle. Keep track of when you’re ovulating and have sex the day before, the day of, and the day after. Timing is really important.”

Step 3: Become the Master of your Menstrual Cycle!

Another dilemma is those darn menstrual cycles. Pain in the stomachs! However, if you can identify and understand your menstrual cycle, it will help you to better know when you are ovulating. A woman's cycle will begin on the first day that she will notice bright red blood, not just spotting. It will also end on the day before the next cycle begins. A cycle can take 21 to 35 days or more, depending on the individual.

Getting pregnant isn’t always easy, but it’s important to remember that it’s still supposed to be fun. As long as you make sure to master these basic steps, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to sit back and enjoy the process. So get to it, Ladies! Understand those ovulation cycles, teach your men how to be romantic beasts, make sure to remain patient, and go make some sweet love! Tonight, if you’d like…